I dont know....

I miss him soooo much! Last night I was on my way home from fishing(the evening bite) and I just started to cry! I was thinking about my dad and how he was the one who barely caught the fish with him and my Uncle Chuck. I wanted to call and talk to him and tell him that my new fishing pole doesnt work....it doesn't catch fish! I have gone out 3 times since I got it and no fish! NONE!!! Or like the other day while walking tru the garden Chris and I planted and noticing the new growth on our crop and how I wanted to gloat to tell him I got tomatoes. I just seem to not want to believe he is not there anymore that he is now just mere ashes.